Re: The Audiophoolery Thread.
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"Kanon DTDK-n50ex Digital Torque Driver was used to assemble the Mini Q. The servo-controlled high-precision screwdriver was able to apply closely matched torque force onto all screw-in points. Thus eliminating unnecessary structural stress that could compromise sound quality." I knew tightening torques were becoming a big thing in electrical wiring regs (i.e. 18th Edition) but look how critical they are for audio too!! Looks like I'll need to borrow my work's torque analyser to check the tightness of my speaker binding posts! |
Re: The Audiophoolery Thread.
The CE mark says it won't hurt people, contains no nasty substances and doesn't make or respond to radio interference.
It doesn't mean that it works in any way, or if it works, that it does anything useful. So "Mostly Harmless" Full marks, though for a real CE mark and not going the 'Chinese Employment' route. David |
Re: The Audiophoolery Thread.
Based on the sort of nonsense spouted on audio tweaks company websites, I thought I'd have a go with the help of a web technobabble generator. This is a made from a number of such phrases spliced together.
What about: "Our new power purifier is based on a radical new technology. It has a phase-locked envelope-tracking resonance subsystem incorporating quasi-orthogonal synthesized advanced-enabled current-sources. The interconnected intelligent feedback uses a partially truncated, but an otherwise freely enabled circulator. The jitter-free module uses several linear incremental sensors driving the phase-noise matrix." Craig |
Re: The Audiophoolery Thread.
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I want one! |
Re: The Audiophoolery Thread.
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'Jitter-free' is great and 'linear' hammers it home. But I'm afraid even these don't undo the damage of synthesised and intelligent. They'll be left thinking digital stuff and software is involved! Just remove these two adjectives and watch the focus group score soar. David |
Re: The Audiophoolery Thread.
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Re: The Audiophoolery Thread.
I fear 'partially truncated' suggests compromise, which is the last thing you want. 'Optimally truncated' or (better) 'optimally tuned' suggests underlying wizardry, opaque to the uninitiated. An effective wheeze for charging more is to suggest that the entry-level model comes with the standard tuning but that for an extra fee this can be custom-profiled to match the properties of the rest of the customer's system. Of course this profiling will need to be re-done each time the customer changes anything else in his setup. Or as the rest of the kit ages.
Cheers, GJ |
Re: The Audiophoolery Thread.
If P T Barnum came back, I wouldn't expect him to go back into the carnival business.
David |
Re: The Audiophoolery Thread.
My audio-babble "advert" was actually a response on another forum, likewise debunking audiophoolery, to an "explanation" of how Bybee's new Quantum (there we go again..) Purifier works:
"In short, our new technology is energized by surrounding energies and then creates an electric and magnetic field of force. In this electric and magnetic field, the polarity of all electrons and protons are altered, affecting their oscillation by making them more aligned with each other. This reaction creates an affect that makes the transfer or sharing of electrons between atoms more streamlined and efficient; and air molecules less resistant" Craig |
Re: The Audiophoolery Thread.
It's amazing more isn't made of 'colour of timbre'.
Who'd of thought the shade of laminated chipboard speaker cabinets would make such an improvement! We cannot leave it there though(?) 'The juxtaposition of linear unipolar response curves verses nulled odd harmonics encompasses the listener with the thrill of 'being there' leaving an imprinted joyous feeling of total escapism of the world around, a genuine unparalleled sense of absoluteness. For our new range of amplifiers fulfill these feelings, plus the additional new feature above. £17,995 without or, £19,999 with … a mute button'. Mark |
Re: The Audiophoolery Thread.
I'd steer well clear (astronomical distances) of anything that could alter the polarity of electrons and protons. Irresistible forces and immovable objects come to mind. 8-o
CERN might like one! |
Re: The Audiophoolery Thread.
Going by past behaviour of the human race, the moment someone can change the polarity of electrons and protons, there will be a visit of several 'men from the ministry' with armed police support to take the machinery away and all those in the know, so that it can be developed into a bomb.
Just look at the panic in some quarters over the turn-on of the LHC... and that was only to try to catch evidence of a particle that was expected to already exist. Craig's version of the quantum purifier may already have been invented, but has been squirrelled away by government and made hush-hush. David (I'd like to be at least one whole universe away...) |
Re: The Audiophoolery Thread.
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I replaced the mains fuse feeding my amplifier, cost 45p, do you know, it made as much difference as spending £1,000 on a new cryo-treated, OFC, Malaysian-cotton insulated mains cable. Really! I measured it, the effect was identical! (No difference noted either way ;D ) |
Re: The Audiophoolery Thread.
Chris/David, the moment when I switched on the first audio power amplifier I designed/built maaaany moons ago, should've been a 'good distance' away!
My father, was, and he heard it go 'pop'! Miscalculated the bias network vs artistic flair coupled with enthusiasm, turns out the power supply, also designed & made by me, was 'over engineered' and could supply quite a bit of current. No audiograde parts were harmed in the making of my college project, but I did learn an awful lot, including the doppler effect. Mark |
Re: The Audiophoolery Thread.
Here's a new one to me:
"One of the first record players capable of sending a signal that’s higher quality than a CD’s, the Cambridge Alva TT Turntable’s aptX Bluetooth allows for truly high-resolution wireless streaming, unlike any you’ve experienced before." One of the first? I can think of many turntable makers that might challenge that - even my Connoisseur/Lenco/M75ED sends a better signal than a CD's Only $1700, tastfully made of Aluminum and Polyoxymethylene. |
Re: The Audiophoolery Thread.
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Re: The Audiophoolery Thread.
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Re: The Audiophoolery Thread.
Few people understand the difference in meaning of resolution and accuracy. You can take a low resolution signal and interpolate it to get higher resolution. But you can't do that with accuracy.
David |
Re: The Audiophoolery Thread.
BT used to have some "power conditioners". One was in an aluminium heavy gauge grey box about 250mm wide, 125mm high and 200mm deep. I had one, stripped all the gubbins out and used it for housing a small atu. That was about 25 years ago. Still have it. Hindsight is a wonderful thing!
I wonder nobody has marketed a power input device that splits the 240v ac into +ve and -ve half cycles (and zero reference) to send up separate cables and re-combine at the audio equipment. Just think what claims you could make for such a device! Rob |
Re: The Audiophoolery Thread.
I stumbled upon an add for special blue coloured cartridge fuses!Other coloured version's are available too with even more outrageous claims made for them,when replacing the humble fuse in power connectors of audio equipment.
They cost (for the entry level version!)$150 each,and "discerning" audiophiles are buying them too it seems? They don't actually claim that the fuses help create "pools of acoustic space",but they might as well do.Perhaps the space though is between the ears of the buyers's I wondered about getting one for the 'fridge as it definitely doesn't sound right. Nick |
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